Self-Acceptance

I honestly believe that we are all products of settings and choices we have had chosen in our daily lives. Our dealings with people around us, our viewpoints, our standards and our beliefs are all reflections of our foundation, the environment we interact with and the things we see, hear, believe and those we are involved with. Self-acceptance is a long-way process of loving ourselves and being happy with who and what we are. When we have truly accepted ourselves, there will be enough contentment and joy in our lives.

As I have personally reflected on my life’s settings and choices, I have come up with realities about myself which I already have accepted. I can never change my past no matter how painful it was. I was a product of rejection in the family but this never stopped me from loving and respecting them up until today. I would claim that I am strong, willed and necessary. I believe that I am beautiful in my own way, and no matter what happened to me in the past, with all my woundedness, mistakes and failures, I know for myself that I am a success, a gift, and loved by GOD just as I am. I have also accepted how others see me as a person, most especially with their words of affirmation which in one way or another have added to how I view and carry myself.

On the other hand, I am also confronted with a reality about myself which I would say I have not fully accepted yet and this is certainly not good. That is when I become too allowing for people to hurt me emotionally. This I mean when I become too receptive of the rejections of the people around me, and when I become too attached to them emotionally, then expect greatly from them. I always give my all when I love, be it a family or friend. Because of this, I also expect them to do me this favor in return. And when something happens, when my expectations fail, I become so affected and hurt.

For these realities, I am really convinced to do something and change what’s not so good especially because I have not fully accepted it yet as part of my person. I can start by being loving to my family and friends without expecting anything in return. Yes, it’s unquestionably fine to be so attached to them but I have to be accepting, too. I have to always bear in my mind that it is impossible to please everyone and my ways will never be the same as that of others’.  This, then is unconditional love and unconditional generosity.

I now realized that I am equally dignified with the rest of God’s creation. What I say and how I say things, what I do and how I act, are all reflections of my realities within. So when I can fully accept myself and all my realities, surely I will be the happiest no matter how unbecoming the situation may be, and I can always look for beauty in this wounded world.

 

Remembering our Yesterday

WMSU-GRAND ALUMNI HOMECOMING

GUEST SPEAKER

February 16, 2019, Saturday, 6:00 pm

Thank you ma'am, for that warm introduction. You may now be seated.

My heartfelt greetings to Dr. Manuel P. Vegare, Unit Coordinator of WMSU-Ipil ESU, Ms. Ma. Michelle A. Helar, Academic Supervisor, other dignified school officials and staff, educators, special guests, alumni, graduating class of 2019, and to everyone here present, good evening!

Thank you so much for having me here. It is an honor and a blessing. The theme for tonight's occasion, "Remembering our yesterday in our Alma Mater, celebrating with fun and loyalty" speaks so much of the truth behind my presence this evening as an act of remembering my Alma Mater with pride and gratitude, my second home, a family I have found.

I was informed that the graduating class of 2019 would be joining us here this evening. I hope I can be an inspiration to you.

My life has never been a bed of roses. I came from a poor family. I need to work hard to augment my studies. I was a working student since my 3rd year in high school until I finished college. Being a working student was never easy. I had difficulty living with other people. Their ways can be confusing sometimes. I could only complain, for during those moments I had nowhere else to go. It was tough. It was tiring. It was painful. But I had to work hard; there was no way I would surrender because I had more important things to consider. But in the end, if I were to count my blessings, these people would always be on top. They considered me a family and still true today. If not with them, I could hardly be where I am now. I endured all struggles life had thrown in my path. I rested whenever I felt exhausted and never gave up. I jumped over the obstacles, and here I am today living my humble dreams, happy and contented. Indeed, when you do your best, your endeavors would always be worth it.  I know, if God is faithful to me for making me go through all these, He is to you as well.

To my fellow alumni, I know life is challenging. Every single day, there are relationships to consider, with yourself, with family, with friends, with decisions and struggles both big and small. Every single day, unexpected things happen, death, sickness, betrayal and many more. Society becomes complicated. Technology and social media have affected our way of life. Discipline has been compromised. Things become out of control. We find endless battles with conflicting ideas. There are much observed emotional, political and social unrests. We come across never-ending clash between families and religions. Racism is still an issue. The unemployed, uneducated individuals still lack confidence. The poor becomes poorer. People become indifferent. And worst, God is forgotten by many. The challenge is for us to remember our yesterday, our days as Crimsons and ask ourselves, what learning did I get from all of it, how would I make use of it, given today's reality.

This occasion is a great opportunity to look back and remember what had been, to recall the fun-filled experiences. Let our FIRSTS, as crimsons, just like our first self-introduction, first crush, first palaro, first report, first induction and acquaintance party, first office call, first Field study, first defense and many more, be a reminder that indeed WMSU can be the best experience.

Personally, my firsts in WMSU taught me to live life. It is during my college days when I realized how education could really change my life. I felt that more than ever, I was more driven to finish my education.  Why? Because WMSU taught me so.

The days of walking from my home to school and vice versa, taught me perseverance. Kanang magbak-lay ta paangat sa skwelahan nga bakilid tawon kau, managko atong bagtak, making this brand so popular in Ipil, TAGA WMSU, DAGKOG BAGTAK!     But, let me change that: TAGA WMSU, DAGKOG PANGANDOY, HAYAG UG KAUGMAON.

The days when I was faced with financial problems either because the contribution was a bit big or because I simply had nothing, taught me that you must speak up for your family because you know very well that they are struggling.

The signing of clearance days nga kinahanglan ka mangguna ug pila ka dupa, equivalent to the number of days you missed from school activities, under the heat of the sun, para lang macleared ug maka take sa exam, taught me sense of responsibility. That, it is part of my role as a student and that it is the school's way of forming us integrally, academics coupled with life skills. That is quality education.

Those days of CHRISTMAS TREE Decoration contest nga maningkamot ug katkat sa kahoy ug taud sa lights ug cellophane nga gibutangag tubig nga naay coloring nga hangtud karun dili jud nako malimtan kay ako jud mismo nikatkat sa una ug ang kahoy nga akong gikatkatan karun dako na kaayo just like the value I got from that experience which is sense of responsibility, making me a responsible educator today.

And I still have more to share about my yesterdays in our Alma Mater, some of which are values I have lived with, my truth, and my reality. 

First, let us make a difference. Let us choose to be humble and honest. Crimsons, we are tasked to uphold the vision and mission of our university. We have the responsibility to fulfill its ideals to become shining examples the world has to see. The world needs you, the world needs us. Let our words be partnered with character, whose ambitions are not selfish.

Second, Live. The past had happened. Let us never allow it to destroy our aspirations because of fear to face the unknown. The future is also yet to come. So, let us live today. How we live today determines the kind of persons we have become after standing from every fall. How we live today marks the kind of persons we will be in the next days of our lives, which is the future.

Third, trust and be patient. God's ways are always better than ours. God isn't finished yet. Each of us is a work in progress. No matter our circumstances, He enables us to dance with challenges, pains and the rest. Because there is a rainbow after every rain and the more we trust, the less we feel afraid. I remembered the days of tedious research work and FS requirements nga feeling nimu, ending na, nga wa nay ugma kay dli naka matulog. But see? I am here, I survived, and you did too. #SaligLang, #LabanLang, #KayaYan!

Let our memories of the past guide us to move forward with loyalty to the school that made us, honed us to be what we are today. And to you graduating students, I know you will share the same sentiments years after stepping out from the portals of WMSU-IPIL. There will be days where you would want to experience once more the fun and memories you have built with your WMSU family, but the challenge is how you would move forward bringing with you the Crimson identity.

To end, allow me to remind you that there is much of God's love and presence to be thankful for. Let our remembering and moving forward be filled with joy and gratitude. Once again, thank you for your generous invitation. A pleasant evening!

I Still Am

I did blame myself for being stupid.

I did curse myself for the negative actions I had chosen.

I did disappoint myself for being too indifferent and insensitive.

I did escape from all the painful realities I'd been to.

I did fail myself for not defending it against any form of abuse.

I did hate myself for being too weak to resist pain and frustrations..

I did hurt myself for hurting others too.

But, with all these things I did, I know that more than my mistakes, I still am…

I am strong.
I am special.
I am grateful.

I am important.

I am unique and special.

I am wonderful and creative.

I am beautiful in my own way.

I am a success, a blessing and a gift.
And most importantly, I am loved by my GOD just as I am.

"Life Is What We Make It"

We are products of settings and choices we opt in our daily lives. Our dealings with people around us, our philosophies, our standards and our beliefs are all reflections of our foundation, the environment we interact with and the things we see, hear, believe and those we are involved with.

But then, what is really the essence of life and how can we make it?

Yes, life is a gift. It is something we need to be grateful of for it is given freely by God. Yes freely, that means, we all have the power and responsibility to change it and make it wonderful in His eyes. But what usually are we missing? We are missing at the point of acknowledging our identity, our foundation. We are missing that knowing of our roots, our core, and our source. Yes, these are the things we fail to recognize. That is why, we become friends with complaints, anger and jealousy. And sometimes, we become more comfortable with them. What exactly are these things? These are our dark realities. I have them, we all have them. No one ever has been exempted from these things. But how can we keep them stay away from us? Simple. Yes, it’s simple to say yet very demanding and difficult to do... Do you know God? Yes, God! The one who created you? Not all of us can directly say and claim, “Yes, I do know Him. He is the center of my life!” Not all of us even believe in Him. But if we do, our life would truly be a wonderful one, wonderful in His eyes. He would be the first person to be very happy with that.

Hence, if we all know Him- our very own source, our foundation, our deep reality, this world would be a better place to live in. Why so? Because, if we acknowledge Him in us, we couldn’t afford to hate and kill each other. No one would be high or low, rich or poor, famous or outcast, intelligent or fool. All of us would be equally dignified because we all come from one source, our God. What we say and how we say things, what we do and how we act are all reflections of our realities within. If all of us have Him, all of us could be His presence and a blessing to this wounded world.

I am Loved Surprisingly

God surprises me every day. Yes, indeed He loves me. His love is manifested in my relationship with people and in the mission He has entrusted to my care. Every time I get attracted to temptations and became weak enough to resist them, He continues to remind me of His great love that no matter what I am loved just as I am. I thank Him for the countless blessings He has bestowed upon me each day. I know well that His surprises in my life are ever amazing and wonderful. And so, each day, I also desire to know Him more, love Him more through giving humble service to others, especially to the least, the last, the lost and the poor, and most importantly to make Him God in my life. His presence unfolds the gate to peace and forgiveness, especially when I get so attached to my responsibilities and when I am tempted to be imprisoned with what others say I am, especially for the hurting comments of people who don't know me by heart. He never fails to remind me of my worth as His child and as His beloved. Each day, I am amazed by His loving revelation of Himself through people, events and situations I am with. Though many times I choose not to listen to Him, I am always thankful that He loves me so much, He owns me and He never allows me to go astray. With that, regardless of the innumerable times that I disappoint Him, He still stays in me. Indeed He is a God who loves surprisingly and these surprises come in His own time perfectly.

“TATAK SPINOLA”

Marcelo Spinola School is where I have been working at as an educator since April 2013. This is a Catholic school owned and administered by the Spinola Sisters whose Charism is to share the personal love of Christ. For almost five years, I’ve been here and indeed, this has become my home and my identity.

Years have passed and I carry with me the “TATAK SPINOLA” identity. Anywhere I go, people look at me as an exemplar of a Spinola educator whose values are in accord to the values of the Gospel.  One that I have been firmly holding on in this school is its simple yet authentic prayer and community life. Here, I know, love and share God more which is manifested in my daily life though everyday I am still trying to make it better and real. This is the reason why I don’t cling to what people ask of me- to look for a greener pasture- because here, it’s even more than enough. I learned to serve with no expectation and give with healthy motivation, I learned to help myself carry on all life’s battles for I am certain and confident that God is with me always; and I learned life’s lessons which helped me grow as a wholesome being, a child of God whom He loves unconditionally. These are but few of the gifts I received from this institution.

Sometimes, it’s difficult to deal with persons whose views are widely different from my own perspective, but above all what prevails in me is the reality that we still need each other because of the relationship we have built and kept in our hearts.  Truly, we are for each other and it is God who sustains the family we treasure. Again, this is the “TATAK SPINOLA” identity, this is the Spinola Family.

Today, I always thank God for the gift of this mission and I have never felt empty in here for this is a work of God and I am just a collaborator, together with my co educators, to His Divine plan.

Today, I am bringing with me the courage to work more, give my best and be part of whatever excellence the school is aiming for, especially in its pastoral mission of sharing the personal love of Christ to the young, through the ministry of education. This is to simply give and share the fruits of the gifts I have received from God. I love the school so much that I couldn’t find any reason to leave it. The “TATAK SPINOLA “ identity has been planted in my heart and it's leading me to God's plans and ways. This has been my home for almost five wonderful and God-filled years and here, I know that I truly have a family. 

Christ, Our Hope of Glory

Indeed, Christ is our hope of glory. It is the same glory when we have joy behind sorrow, hope behind failures, strength behind flaws, smile behind tears, faith behind uncertainties, love behind hates and honor behind shame. These are all but things we always dream to feel and experience in our life. We all wanted things to go our way because this is what we believe would make us happy. But real happiness is not found in the things we do, not even limited to our human perspective. It is found only if we hope in Christ, the source of genuine happiness.

As a Spinola educator, the 51st International Congress in Cebu City had taught me many things.  I’m pretty sure that with God’s grace, I can share it to my families and the rest. I came to realize that in order for me to bring Christ to my family, students and community, I must have Him first. Another is that, Jesus in the Eucharist makes Himself always present to us; therefore I must make myself available for Him in my way of attending the Mass and in engaging myself into deep prayer and contemplation so as to make Him the center of my life. I must speak about him, confess my sins to Him and come to Him in every way.

Making Jesus a part of my life is a call, especially in my being, a Spinola Educator. This is a call that I need to pursue and persevere so students could see me as a model that even in little ways, they could learn that the world they are in today is all temporary and that only their relationship with Jesus is eternal. This is only possible if I show or teach them in words and deeds the way to live as real Christians using my own gifts and realities. Yes, I am broken, so wounded, yet Christ surely fills it and makes me worth it.

I always tell my students that whatever they do is a reflection of what is in their hearts. So if Jesus is in their hearts, they would also see, act and love like Him.

Believing that nothing is impossible in Christ, I know that one day, these dreams I have will become a reality. No matter how hopeless is the world today, I have hope in Christ that He will fill the hearts of all people with His grace and love so they can make a difference, stand for truths, risk for others’ good, conquer their fears without sacrificing their learned values, and deliver anything that is asked of them in a more Christian way.

The challenge left in me now after the Congress is how to live a life where I can be with others, be it my students, family and communities, for Christ lived and died for all not for Himself. I am on a continuous process of responding the call of bringing Him to others, a hope to them especially to those whom I constantly encounter. As long as I have Christ in me, there is always a hope that this dream of mine will become possible.